Chelsea lost to Man City last weekend but have hogged the headlines for the wrong reasons ever since.
The soap opera, with a cast of 43 players including eight goalkeepers, is no longer just crackpot, its bordering on suspicious.
Any more nonsense and it will look like sabotage by a bunch of rogue owners hired by a super-rich rival club.
I jest neither Arsenal nor Spurs are rich enough anyway but could it be the plot for a fanciful Netflix football thriller?
Just look at the Blues in the 30 months since Todd Boehlys Clearlake Capital bought the European champions from Roman Abramovich.
Boehly gives the terminally-hated Glazers at Manchester United a run for their money.
He paid too much (4.25 billion) in the first place and then sacked the manager.
That was despite Tommy Tuchel having turned the team around after Frank Lampard had struggled with the same players.
Tuchels replacement, Graham Potter, was the wrong fit and out of his depth, but Boehly replaced him with Lampard as caretaker.
Mauricio Pochettino was next but had a tough job as the owners continued to buy players they didnt need and sell ones they did.
When Chelsea lost to City last Sunday, the only member of their Champions League-winning team on the field was Mateo Kovacic, wearing the lighter blue of City.
Clearlake also paid over the odds for less than stellar recruits whom they rewarded with extraordinarily-long contracts.
Argentina midfielder Enzo Fernandez is one who cost a British record 106m and was given an eight-and-a-half-year deal.
He won the World Cup, but had played only 17 games in Europe (for Benfica) when Chelsea broke the bank for him.
When Poch finally managed to sort out the mess to finish last season strongly and qualify for Europe, he was sacked.
In came Italys Enzo Maresca, who won promotion with Leicester last season, but is a rookie in the EPL.
He is the bookies second favourite for the Sack Race.
If there is any logic to the Clearlake plan it seems to be to buy a squad of talented young players, put them on long contracts and let the manager work with them.
This is what Pochettino finally did but the moment he got to remember all the names and faces, he was out.
It must be said that he wasnt too sorry to leave the madhouse with his bank balance enhanced and his reputation unharmed.
But what does this say about the owners?
We thought Abramovich was impatient, but he was a paragon compared to these clowns.
Ruthless, yes, but it did bring success 18 major trophies in 19 years.
The Russian also set up the academy which has produced a rich crop of youngsters as he aimed to make the club self-sustaining in the long run.
One by one, Boehly has been selling the family silver as the fee for each academy grad goes on the balance sheet as pure profit.
Other clubs do the same, but Chelsea, who have perhaps the most successful academy in the EPL, are mining it to the last nugget.
This is much to the dismay of their fans who consider each player as one of their own.
The likes of Mason Mount, Callum Hudson-Odoi, Ruben Loftus-Cheek and now Connor Gallagher have all been brought up as Blues from childhood.
For them to be shipped out when the books need balancing has only increased the sense of disconnect throughout the club.
Gallagher, dubbed Chelsea since birth, was treated like a misplaced delivery package when he was sent back and forth to Atletico Madrid until a price was agreed.
Rubbing salt into the self-inflicted wound was that he was making way for Joao Felix, hardly a raging success when on loan two seasons ago.
And the Portuguese is costing more than what theyre getting for Gallagher.
The Englishman was Chelseas second-best player of last season behind Palmer, is immensely popular with the fans and from a family of Chelsea die-hards.
But this traffic is not all one way: Chelsea benefitted when City did the same with Cole Palmer and picked up a bargain for 42m at the start of last season.
The midfielder became Chelseas Player of the Year, shone with England in the Euros and would be worth double that now.
On the other hand, Chelsea have sold off bargains, too, when the lack of judgment can be breathtaking.
Hudson-Odoi, once valued at 70m but a flop on loan at Bayern Munich, was sold off to Nottingham Forest last year for just 3m.
He lost pace after an Achilles operation but a grateful Forest would want 10 times that for him now.
Even the cunning use of long contracts to exploit the amortisation of a players value has been curbed by the EPL limiting contracts to just five years.
So, it is hard to make any sense of what the owners are doing. As Maresca said this week, Not all the players are training with me I cannot see them all. There isnt space for them.
The Italian has double the permitted number (25) of players at his disposal with as many as eight or nine given players flexibility competing for one slot in the starting XI.
Ex England boss Gareth Southgate felt uncomfortable with 26 at the Euros, so what chance is there with 43?
It is no wonder Raheem Sterling, at 29, one of their elder statesmen, asked for clarity when left out completely for the City game.
With the amount of churn building to a fast-approaching end of the transfer window next Friday, that is the last thing Clearlake can give.
An equity company, you would hope investors are enjoying more for their money than Chelseas fans.
As for the EPL, its as if one of the Big Six has removed itself from the contest.
As Liverpool owner John Henry once asked of Arsenal: What are they smoking over there?
The views expressed are those of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of FMT.